Thursday, January 8, 2009

Due date +1

We're now at the due date +1. So how am I?

Besides the fact that my feet are swollen to the point I can only wear my husband's flip flops, I'm hanging in there. That's if I overlook dreading going to bed- because after finally getting into bed, like a pancake continuously flip from side to side to avoid getting bed sores and to allow blood to flow back into which ever arm I happen to be currently trying to sleep on. It takes about 3 minutes to reposition. Once I've finally found a position that is remotely close to comfortable, I have to use the bathroom for the umpteenth time, waddling like a duck every step of the way.

I have two appetites: I can't eat anything because nothing sounds good, even when I'm hungry, or I eat everything in sight times two! Either way, I am bound to down another package of tums to avoid serious heartburn (another reason I get no sleep). I can't tell the difference between a contraction and having to go to the bathroom, and the highlight of my day is a good bowel movement.

I'm currently on maternity leave, which is in the best interest of all involved due to my tendency to cry at the slightest bit of stress.At the same time it's incredibly frustrating to want to accomplish so much but barely have the strength to get myself up off the lovesac. I've learned from watching day time tv commercials that I'm wasting my life and I really should be entering a technical college, my regular job is a total crock because I could be making millions from home, and I'm an idiot for not buying silver coins (because the price of silver WILL go up!) and the snuggie is the best thing since crocs.

My heart rate increases just by walking to the mailbox, and my breathing is so heavy that after climbing a simple flight of stairs I need to sit down and take a break. I can't figure out why doctors keep asking for urine samples when I can't even see down there. One more week of this and I'll be ready to do ANYTHING to get this kid out, including reaching for the first leatherman to cut it out myself BUT excluding sex!

My favorite is when people tell me I'll 'miss' being pregnant. I'll no more miss being pregnant than I miss acne and the 7th grade. I can't blame her for not wanting to come out, all I do is watch an hour of the news and think "no wonder she wants to stay in there!"


crazy4danes said...

Hang in there! I know how frustrating the post due date days can be! And trust some point soon you will miss being pregnant! LOL ;P

Kristy said...

I could have written this post 9 months ago! Hang in there! Hopefully it won't be too much longer! And I hear you about not missing being pregnant--I still don't miss it. In fact, the thought of doing it again makes me physically ill. Looks like I'm having an only child!
Good luck with everything!

Kamilli Vanilli said... husband and I are trying to figure out if we should have any more kids. I think this post might just be the answer I've been looking for... :)

I think you've described late-term pregnancy perfectly!!! haha. Sorry, I shouldn't laugh...I know it's not funny when you're experiencing it...but it's funny for the rest of us to look back and laugh at how miserable we were. Good luck! It can't go for much longer....

Allie said...

I don't think I miss being pregnant. I thought parts of being pregnant were neat, but overall, I don't miss it.

I miss my baby being a baby. He's gotten big all of a sudden.

I was always induced a week or so after my due date.

You have to be miserable before labor so that it doesn't sound like such an unpleasant prospect. :)

(Good Luck, I've been wondering if you'd had that baby yet since you hadn't posted in awhile! I hope it's soon, and it's a super easy delivery!)

Melissa said...

You hit the nail on the head. "I'll be ready to do ANYTHING to get this kid out."

That is exactly why pregnancy lasts 9 months and not 6 or 7 or even 8. It has to get really really bad then you are willing to end it, even if the thought of labor makes you weak in the knees.

You've been on my mind. I looked at baby girl things today and thought of you and how your little one will be here soon. I love newborns. Adore them. sigh.

Britt said...

Oh the joys of pregnancy! I will NOT give you any typical words of advice. I only give you my deep sympathy.

Tracy said...

I think that means you're ready now. I was talking to a girlfriend who has 9 kids and she was telling me about a conversation she had with a first time mother who was still nervous about childbirth. She told her, "Oh honey. That just means you're not ready yet. When you're ready, you don't care if they take a chainsaw to you. You just want it OUT!!!"

I've so been there!!! Hope you're kissing and holding your baby soon!!!

Chantel said...

I'm so there for you! I'm 34 wks prego with my 3rd and already feeling your pain. I was 2 wks late with my first in Utah and so miserable. If the wait doesn't kill you, all the ridiculous labor inducing advice from everyone and their dogs will. The best advice I received was from my midwife who told me to take the phone off the hook ('cause people were getting mad thinking I'd simply forgotten to call and announce our baby's arrival) and have hubby rent lots of movies for me. Hang in there. I'll send a prayer from Cali your way late tonight when I make my umpteenth trip to the bathroom.

Happy The Man said...

Whatever you do, don't bother making yourself sick on Castor Oil, it doesn't work, unless you want to feel worse than you do now, it will definitely do that... My wife can attest to this.

Adam & Kristen Birkmeyer said...

1. I can sympathize with you. When I was pregnant, I was trying to shred some paper, dropped the paper and I cried because I couldn't bend over to pick it up. I think we're given an extra tear duct when we are pregnant to handle all the extra tears.
2. You won't miss being pregnant. Whoever told you that must not have been pregnant when they said it or else they wouldn't have said it.

Cathleen said...

As someone who has given birth 9 times, I can attest to the fact that you won't miss being pregnant. I do not enjoy being pregnant (and very sick) and I moan and groan the whole time.
I do however miss the having that fresh, sweet spirit join our family. I have been trying to get pregnant for the last 2 years with no luck. I am yearning for that baby and dreading pregnancy at the same time. Yeah...I lost my mind a long time ago!
Good luck to you....I feel your pain :0)

jess said...

i sooooo feel your pain. my advice? when i was 2 days past due i thought my water broke (apparently i was wrong) and once i got the hospital they figured they may as well induce me since i was past due. when all else fails,just fake it!

ChelMo said...

Your blog is such good birth control! I'm at the point where I *should* be missing pregnancy, I *should* be craving a little bundle in my arms, and I *should* have forgotten about all the bad parts of being pregnant, but there's apparently something wrong with me. I still get heartburn just thinking about my third trimester. Good luck.

Try going for a long walk just to have something to concentrate on. Left foot, right foot, oh no there's a crack in the sidewalk, left foot, ouch! my back! right foot, okay the knee's about to give out. back home.

Della Hill said...

Have you given in and bought life insurance from Colonial Penn?
Don't you know your rates can never go up, and your coverage will never go down due to age?
Did you buy a snuggie? They do look cozy.
I much prefer The Price is Right to the 700 Club at 11:00.
Other than that I don't have much advice for you. (Except sex really might help).
But I do have lots of sympathy.
I'm so sorry.
Good luck.
I'll be checking regularly to see when she lets you out of your misery by putting you in extreme pain.
Great post, btw.

Tim&Kirst said...

Oh my word--you crack me up! :) I can relate to the heartburn, flip flopping pancake move at night and peeing every moment I can. Hang in there, she'll be here before you know it. :)

Melissa said...

I think Jess is on to something. I went to the hospital 10 days before Jane was due and refused to leave till I had a baby in my arms.

She was born about 12 hours later.
Really. Ask Dave. I wasn't really in labor, I was just D.O.N.E.

Daisy Paige said...

Hmmm...I figured you'd had the baby and that's why you hadn't posted in a spell. Meanwhile, I'm starting to wonder if I'm the exception and not the rule - I was never that miserable even one week overdue. Hope she gets here soon, for your sake!

joanna said...

I am totally feeling this, and I feel for you. Hang in there. My baby wouldn't emerge until he was forced. He is almost 18 months and I am still not ready for another pregnancy. Not sure if I ever will be.
You will make it! Rent all the Harry Potter movies.

The Belyea Bunch said...

I love your comment about the tums, but I went for the liquid form. When my water broke and we were loading up in the car to head for the hospital, I panicked and made my husband go back in the house for my antiacid. I actually held onto it during labor. It was my only hope of survival.
Good luck, can't wait to see the little red headed girl !!!!

Linda said...

I was 3 weeks late on a baby that the Dr told me 3 weeks early, "get ready...could be coming any day now." So 6 weeks later going for a ride over dirt trails on the back of a Honda 50 did it for me.
We are thinking about you several times a day.

Hilary said...

Good luck! I am thinking of you. I hope you don't have to go the leatherman route. Can't wait to hear the news! You are going to do great!

Linda said...

dang! just checking in to see if the bun is out of the oven yet.

Sally said...


Can you twitter on your blog or something? Let us know every 2-3 hours how horrible you feel? Because I am seriously waiting to hear the news.

Jeri and Amy said...

"I've learned from watching day time tv commercials that I'm wasting my life and I really should be entering a technical college, my regular job is a total crock because I could be making millions from home, and I'm an idiot for not buying silver coins (because the price of silver WILL go up!) and the snuggie is the best thing since crocs."

most genius thing I have ever read on any blog EVER! This is why I don't blog-- who can follow THAT?