Friday, July 23, 2010

The Problem With Not Being Easily Offended

We tend to be viewed as 'insensitive' to others.

We wouldn't be offended by it, so why would someone else?

Things that we would consider as a natural part of every day conversation others misinterpret as an attack. Typically it will take someone a few months of knowing us to realize- 'that's just who they are'

Not being easily offended, or caring what others think is a liberating quality- but it can also limit one's inner circle of friends to individuals that have really good self-esteem, are very thick skinned, or are extremely forgiving. I think I'm ok with that.

4 comments:

shenpawarrior said...

I think we all act in ways to keep people at certain distances according to what we are comfortable with. For example, I know a lot of people who use sarcasm and humor to keep people at arms length in terms of emotional closeness. Other people other strategies. It took me years to realize that I spent much of my younger life (especially high school) isolating myself from groups I dismissed as "jocks" or just "people I don't like" really because I was afraid of making friends and then losing them. I felt more comfortable in my little circle.

If the end result is a limited circle of friends with certain characteristics, and that's what we prefer the great. We just need to be sure that that's what we ultimately want.

Amy said...

Have to say I love your blog--not just this post, but all of them! You articulate so well the things I am often thinking. This entry is spot on!

Salt H2O said...

Sherpa,
You make a good point. I decided that I don't want to change who I am to enlarge the circle of friends that I have close to me.

Amy,
Just one of many reasons why we are friends.

Steve said...

There is a big difference between being "not easily offended" and "not caring what others think". These can exist together or exclusively. I wish more people were "not easily offended" and less the latter. Here's why:

The "easily not offended" can talk openly and honestly about problems, find solutions, and are able to tackle the real problems in society without having to hide behind religion, political correctness, or embarassment.

The problem with the latter, which is good in certain stages is that when everyone "doesn't care", no one cares and everyone just does that is best for them, not society. Society turns in the Jersey Shore, just a lot less spray tanning and abs. Not good for anyone.