Friday, November 1, 2013

Keeping the Sabbath Day Holy

It's one of those 10 commandments that almost everyone believes in but we the majority of society also ignores (see using the name of God in vain).  It's also subject to personal revelation what is keeping the Sabbath day holy to one- staying at home with family and playing board games- is a direct violation of the Lords commandments to another because you took 5 too many steps.

As a Mormon there are varying degrees of keeping the Sabbath- we generally do not do anything that forces others to work- unless of course a child is sick or you're missing an egg for the brownie mix you've already mixed up.  The Sabbath day is a big ol' bunch of gray which consists of 'it's between you and the Lord' ie- flying on Sunday- I know LDS prophets and apostles fly on Sunday- is it ok because they're prophets and about the Lords work or is it ok because it's not a constant practice and thus keeping the spirit of the law? It doesn't really matter- I don't judge.

Then there's the vacation clause  and 'one and done'.  I'll admit as a very religious Seminary graduate and BYU student it never crossed my mind in the month I was backpacking Europe to find a meeting house- we spent Sundays in Cathedrals, and even at Dachau- the German Concentration Camp Museum.  Did we break the Sabbath?  According to a lot of LDS people we did- but thank heaven they're not the ones to stand in judgement of me at the last day.  Between me and my Lord- we're good.

One and done is popular when visiting friends and family- and given that there is no where where Jesus stated "worship for 3 hours solid while sitting in a hardback chair while trying to wrangle a 10 month old from eating the shoelaces of a fellow Christian" I'm cool.

When single keeping the Sabbath day holy was also combined with trying to find a mate. Church being a combination of religion and social posturing was a challenge- and rarely would I have called it 'spiritual'- which as many would be quick to point out, was probably my fault.  Then a friend asked me if I wanted to run a marathon on Sunday. My first marathon- in Las Vegas none the less, on Sunday.  Considering that the alternative to running 26.2 miles was sleeping till 10, going for a walk on the beach and then 3 hours of this dance of religion, fashion and poor flirting- I said yes.

That 26.2 mile Sunday was one of the most religious experiences I've had.  It was a life lesson which many marathoners are quickly to discuss- but did I feel like I was being judged by God for running on Sunday? No.

Fast forward 6 years and I'm at mile 3 of the Walt Disney World Marathon, on a Sunday again. I notice my iPhone is missing from my arm band. My iPhone- my connection to work and the world. I literally spent 23.2 miles of running combined with prayer- oh yes, I prayed while running for 4 hours- and the prayer went like this "Dear Lord, I promise if you help me find my cell phone I will never run on a Sunday again"...and my cell phone was found, returned and in very usable condition.

Which brings me to why I'm writing this post-WHY THE HELL ARE ALL MARATHONS ON SUNDAY!?!?! Man that really really stinks. Really stinks.

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Get The Government Out Of Marriage

Why is it when a priest, bishop, whomever preforms a religious ceremony it has legal ramifications?
How is it a member of the clergy has legal power to bind two people together in the eyes of the state?

Isn't that kind of messed up?
It's like if you get baptized and got your drivers licence. 

Government should not recognize marriage, any marriage. 

Now if 2 or 3 or 8 people want to come together and create a union of sorts which spells out death benefits, insurance benefits so on and so forth- it's a legal contract created by lawyers or government officials.  

If religious leaders want their members to obtain such a document between two consenting adults before they perform the religious ceremony of a marriage- then so be it.

I wrote this post when Prop 8 was first being debated,A Rose By Any Other Name and while I stand by my logic in the post, my opinion has 'evolved' or since I'm a conservative 'flip flopped'.   Government has no business being in marriage.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Trading Up

My 4 year old daughter who had been an absolute delight for the majority of our stay in California, decided that the day we went to Disneyland was the day she was going to be the very worst version of herself- go figure.  We had the typical Disneyland meltdowns over things of zero significance.  There with my sister and her fiance- they both said "and this is why we're using as much birth control as possible."  As I watched them at Disneyland I remembered when Brent and I didn't have kids, and how easy it was.  A part of me, a very small part of me missed that time- but then I looked at this guy: 

and I realized I traded up. 

I see pictures of family members and friends wakeboarding on facebook.  I use to spend my summers wakeboarding - I miss it dearly, and at times I find myself in the middle of a small pity party because it's been so long. I may not get to wakeboard- but I get to go swimming with the cutest 4 year old and 5 month old in the world- I traded up. 

I use to live on the beach- waking up at 5 am to run with sound of the waves to pace myself- now I live in Texas so that we can support our family and run on a treadmill to the sound of the baby monitor in case my little one wakes.  Yep, I traded up. 

The same goes for snowboarding,  going out at night, and fun vacations.  

I miss traveling dearly and when trying to plan a vacation- it's challenging to find something that suits the ages of all those in my family.  I know that someday we will be able to go on adventurous international  vacations again- and when that day comes I'll also be missing the little girl that wanted snuggles from her mommy at night, and all she wanted to do is to be just like her mom.  I'm going to be missing that little boy who's face breaks out in the biggest smile ever when he sees his mom.  That's what I traded snowboarding and travel in for- and I traded up. 

And last night as I watched the Bachelorette (hate that show, will explain in another post why I watch it) I looked at these people trying desperately to find what I have.  They live in a mansion, they go on insane vacations, they have great bodies- but what they really want is to be lying in bed with their spouse in a semi-clean house and hearing their 5 month old baby giggling to himself at 3 am.   I am living the dream. 

Oh yes, my life right now is lacking the adventure and spontaneity I became accustomed to before I had kids- but there is no doubt about it. I traded up. 

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Why I Want My Kids To Go to a Terrible High School

I was told yesterday that they're considering redistricting our neighborhood so my kids would end up going to a much better high school A much more competitive high school.  A High School parents specifically move to this community for.  My response "Aw hell"

Scenario:  A university has 2 applicants from 2 different High Schools.  They are absolutely identical in extra circular   SAT's and essays are both exceptional.  However one has a 3.98 GPA and the other a 3.75, which one is going to get accepted?

Same scenario- except this time they have the same GPA, however one was ranked in the top 2% of their class and the other in the top 10%- which one is going to get accepted?

In answering either scenario did you think:  Well what high school did they go to? 

Didn't think so.  Universities don't care what High School you went to- just what your grades were. If you go to a competitive High School it's harder to get those high scores.  If you go to a mediocre high school- much easier.   

It seems to me we should want our kids to go to the best elementary school and Jr high but once they hit high school age- get an apartment on the wrong side of town, your kids will be grateful you did- especially if you are planning on buying a beach house instead of paying for your kid's tuition.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Baby Shower Give Aways

While pregnant I sing baby songs to myself.  Not like lullabies- but like "Hey baby, hey baby, hey! (girls say, boys say)"  So for my sister's shower we burned CD's- named them "BABY" and we did not include the play list. So when the listener popped it in the CD player they were surprised.   I thought I'd share with the world (or really- just my 6 readers) my baby shower CD of awesomeness play-list.

Baby Love - The Supremes
Ice, Ice Baby - Vanilla Ice
There Goes My Baby- The Drifters 
Baby, Don't Forget My Number - Milli Vanilli
Come Back Baby- Ray Charles

Hit Me Baby One More Time- (Travis Cover of Brittney) 
Baby –(the Reliant K cover of Justin Bieber)
Be My Baby (be my little baby) - 1963 - The Ronettes
Don't Call Me Baby - 2000 - Madison Avenue
Here Comes My Baby - 1967 - The Tremeloes
Hey Baby (hey baby, hey baby, hey) – 2002 – No Doubt
Baby, Baby - Amy Grant

 (It''s a non-political, non-religious, not pro-Texas post! Does this blog even do fluff pieces? - oh yea, more fluff coming your way!)

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Judge Not

Here's the dilemma: Someone is passing judgement on you. In turn it's impossible to not turn the judgement back on them.  We don't like being judged by someone who knows nothing about our circumstances but because they are judging us- we judge them right back- calling them judgemental (and self-righteous and arrogant or whatever)

A week or so ago- I figured out how to not judge someone that was judging me. It felt light a huge weight was just lifted off my shoulders. 

In church (you knew it was going to start that way didn't you) a woman gave a talk about how women need to not work and stay at home.  Commence eye roll.  I thought 'How am I going to have a conversation with this woman?  She'll just be someone I'll politely try to avoid."  She then expressed gratitude that every once in a while her husband helps out with the chores.   That was the moment - she doesn't know.  She doesn't there are women out there that have husbands that do all the cooking- that do a large portion of the cleaning and even more importantly - spend daily quality time with the kids.  I saw this woman married to a man who 'occasionally' helped out- and this is her normal.  Not only is this her normal- she thinks this is every one's normal.  

Of course! If you assume every woman is married to a man who doesn't share in household duties and child rearing- of course you think women need to stay home! Who else is going to meet those needs if not a stay at home mom.  If I was in her circumstances I very well could think the same thing too! 

If you're blessed with talents of house making - cooking, cleaning and crafting- not understanding that other women don't have those talents and worse- have other talents that need to be magnified- like a propensity for biochemistry; one could think that women working was a waste. She doesn't know the depression that accompanies an individual when God given talents and passions are ignored. 

She didn't know that some of us were not given the emotional fortitude to be home full time- and if we were our marriages would be destroyed- because we'd be lunatics.  She didn't know that for some- we're making the choice between giving a child a happy home, parents with a great marriage or a stay at home mom. 

Everything shifted for me in that moment.  I looked at this woman not with pity- because I'm sure she enjoys the life she chose.  I wasn't remotely defensive.  I thought "she doesn't understand that we're not all like her"  in that moment- every passive aggressive comment I had received, from family members, associates, strangers was seen in a new light.  These people thought their lives were the norm, not realizing every individual, every marriage is different. Of course- if every marriage and every family was like theirs- of course their way would be the right way to do things. 

My new thought when someone is passing judgement- to refrain from judging that person back is to realize that if I was in their circumstances I'd probably think the same thing too.